It's been a while since I've done a book review, though I have been reading somewhat consistently before bed again which is something I'm happy about. I do think book reviews/analysis are important though to help me record the impression a book left on me, even though it does require quite a bit of effort. Usually, I just search around on reddit for discussion threads to see what other people thought of a book but I suppose it is important to capture my own thoughts after all.
Anyway, I finally got around to reading Siddhartha by German author Herman Hesse. This one had been on my to-read list for a while and, it was actually a fairly short book so I figured it'd be a good candidate these past few weeks. The book itself deals with a lot of "spiritual" types of themes (exploring Buddhism) and philosophy about how to really live a fulfilling life. I thought it was pretty apt to read this book during Ramadan as I had decided to try fasting for most of the month - not out of any true religious reason but rather just to see how I dealt with it.
Siddhartha tells the story of the titular character who essentially abandons his home in order to join a group of wandering monks. While he's with these monks, he learns how to meditate and forgo any worldly possessions and desires. However, he realizes after a few years that the monks have nothing left to teach him and decides to move onwards to the city where he falls in love with a beautiful courtesan (which actually means someone who is a high class prostitute, I had to look this one up). He then starts to live a more "normal" life which is a stark contrast to when he was with the monks - he takes up drinking and ends up getting a typical job as a salesman etc.
The last arc of the book deals with Siddhartha's return to his more monk-like ways when he wakes up one day and basically has an existential crisis. He leaves the city and goes to live in the forest with this other old sage and meditates some more. He then realizes he had a son with the courtesan I mentioned in the previous paragraph but that son turns out to be nothing like him at all - he is very spoiled, worldly and resents Siddhartha himself. This causes Siddhartha much grief as he tries to get his son to conform to his simple/spiritual way of life but eventually he accepts that his efforts are futile. He finally comes to understand that his son must find his own path in life, just like Siddhartha did. Eventually, his son runs away (presumably back to the city) and Siddhartha never sees him again.
That's basically it. One scene near the end of the novel that stuck out to me is when Siddhartha sees his reflection in the water and realizes that he's gotten old. Not just that, but he's old enough that Siddhartha is reminded of his own father and realizes that he basically ran away from his father/home just as his son has done to him. I thought that was pretty touching as it represented the whole cyclical nature of one's journey through life - that everyone has to forge their own path and sometimes we don't realize how poorly we've treated others until someone treats us that way as well. Basically, we get tricked into holding ourselves to a different standard than how we would judge other people.
Overall, I would say I enjoyed the book. As mentioned before, it was an easy read and not too long - it also didn't feel shallow in the same way that certain popular spiritual books try to be (like The Alchemist, which is super cringe). Even though it was clearly set a much earlier time period than the present day, I feel like Siddhartha's journey towards enlightenment is somewhat universal - how he goes from one extreme (living with the monks and meditating) to the other (living a pleasurable life in the city) in order to truly understand himself.
As mentioned earlier, I was trying to mostly fast this month during the time I was reading this book. In that sense, I felt like I could relate to Siddhartha's experience with the monks. At first it feels like you're hungry all the time and you don't think you can last - but then you realize that you have more control over your body than you think. Then you start to resent or judge others for being such slaves to food or their base desires. The last step is realizing that there's probably no prize for denying yourself physical pleasures though. At the end of the day, we have to inhabit this body for the rest of our lives so we shouldn't feel bad or try to fully repress these biologically desires that are literally coded into our genome. But we should try to acknowledge that we don't have to let them dictate our lives.
Even before fasting, I felt like I looked down on others who were self-proclaimed "foodies" or cared about going to fancy restaurants. It always felt to me like such a insignificant thing to care about (as long as you were eating healthy) because hunger just seems like such a basic need. What makes human's unique is our ability to think and reason at a higher level and that's what we should be proud of. This reminds me of a quote when a merchant asks Siddhartha what his skills are and he responds:
I can think. I can wait. I can fast.
My interpretation of this quote is that Siddhartha seems to be supporting my view of the world. That what matters in terms of providing value is the ability to think (at a higher cognitive level), have patience and not be ruled by basic desires. But we shouldn't just repress our biological desires for the sake of it and to the point where it just becomes a point of pride or a contest (ie. who can fast the longest) - I think it's implied that's why Siddhartha left the monks. Rather, the idea is that we should keep these desires around and not let them overpower us - take pleasure from them when we can and maybe even use them to motivate us - but ultimately let our ability to "think" guide our path through life.
The last point I want to make is that a major theme of the book is the value of questioning everything and being inquisitive. Siddhartha goes through many lives throughout the novel but is not afraid to move on and leave everything behind when he feels there is nothing more to learn. In fact, Hesse creates another character (Siddhartha's best friend, Govinda) to illustrate just how important this point is. Govinda is basically just a follower. He's seems to be someone who's just seeking the support of a group and looking for someone (or something) to tell him how to live his life. So when him and Siddhartha live with the monks, Govinda ends up staying for the rest of his life while Siddhartha moves on after a few years.
The takeaway here for me is that, to truly live a life you can be proud of, you have to be willing to leave it all behind if you don't feel like there's anything else to learn. Don't be fooled by the feeling of comfort but always be ready to embark on your next adventure. Sure, it's easy if someone just tells you the ideal way to live your life and find purpose but that will never make you fully satisfied, in my opinion. The only way to achieve a sense of true purpose is by questioning everything and taking the steps to explore on your own, no matter how uncomfortable it may be.
