Memory Drawer

In my room at home, I have a drawer where I keep almost everything that’s special or relevant to me. You could say it’s like my original blog. Since, probably, Grade 8, I’ve keep special notes/cards/movie tickets/anything that I’ve received from people. This drawer is special in that it ONLY contains “social” memories not like…tests I did well on (or failed?), though I do try to keep those too. Anyway, I like to think that it helps summarize my middle/high school years in one drawer. It does a good job of it too, I might add. Of course, it’s disorganized/clutter to no end, but…I sort of like it that way because then you’ll never know what you are going to find but you know that everything is there, just like how memories usually are.

            Recently, I was trying to find a letter a friend gave me for Christmas. I didn’t end up finding it yet but I plan to check again tonight. I found a lot of other stuff though. Including a bag containing my bountenair from Prom. It’s not as pretty now as it was then. In fact, it’s mostly all black, frayed, decayed, wilted and pitiful looking. I could go into a bunch of analogies about beauty fading and all that but…I’ll leave it to your fine imagination.

            Anyway, I thought it was really cool because it was almost like the visual complement to this blog. The sad part is, I haven’t really added much to it since I’ve gone to university. I don’t think I’ve shared that many special memories with anyone here yet…or at least, anything where I’ve had a physical remainder of it to save.

            And I worry sometimes, if these four years of university will just end up being a big “blank” in my memories years from now when I think back to the people I met and who I was at that time…

Update:

            So I found that note from a friend I was finally searching for amongst all these other thoughts in that drawer.  It made me feel really sad - sadder than I had ever felt in a while. It reminded me of the relationships I had in the past and how much they meant. It reminded me of the value of friendship and closeness with others, which is something I think I really needed to remember amidst academia, accumulation of material possessions and the other entire things one can get ensnared by in life if they are not careful. She may never read this, she may never even know who she is, but thank you. And I will try to follow your advice as best as I can. Always.